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Bye Bitch! Serena Williams Defeated, Leaves Tennis Forever

After learning that Serena Williams is finally retiring, I’ve watched all her matches at the US Open, rooting against her every step of the way. Early victories were easily predictable, but I had no doubt in my mind that this old hag will eventually succumb and not win the trophy.

So when Ajla Tomljanovic defeated her in the third round of the tournament, effectively ending Serena’s career, I was ecstatic. I jumped up and down like a kid on Christmas morning in a halo of cheers and N-bombs coming from the bar audience.

Women’s tennis sucks dick, but at least from now on it will be a much fairer sport. Until she got old and insufferable, Serena beat everyone simply because she had a considerable physical advantage over her opponents. Nothing to do with skill or intelligence; she beat everyone because she’s barely a woman. Her blistering powerful serve, considered the greatest in the history of women’s tennis, was produced by those biceps – pure muscle strength, which the other players always lacked.

Every woman who played against this bitch when she was still worth a damn and lost did so because it wasn’t a fair game from the get-go; they might as well have played against a male tranny.

What illustrious career? If you cut off her hair and tits, she looks like a Zulu warrior.

SPARE SOME COIN

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