The Joys Of Philanthropy
Stephen Leacock
“Good-morning,” said the valet de chambre, as I stepped from my room.
“Good-morning,” I answered. “Pray accept twenty-five centimes.”
(more…)An Opportunity
Anonymous
I dropt into the post-office this morning for my mail, and just inside the door I found a little boy crying very bitterly. Naturally I asked him the cause of his trouble, and lifting his tear-stained face to mine he said:
“I had two quarters, and a feller come along just now and took one away from me.”
(more…)My Lost Opportunities
Stephen Leacock
The other day I took a walk with a real estate man. Out in the suburbs he leaned over the wooden fence of an empty lot and waved his hand at it.
“There’s a lot,” he said, “that we sold last week for half a million dollars.”
“Did you really!” I exclaimed.
(more…)Preventing A Scandal
Bill Nye
Boys should never be afraid or ashamed to do little odd jobs by which to acquire money. Too many boys are afraid, or at least seem to be embarrassed when asked to do chores, and thus earn small sums of money. In order to appreciate wealth we must earn it ourselves. That is the reason I labor. I do not need to labor. My parents are still living, and they certainly would not see me suffer for the necessities of life. But life in that way would not have the keen relish that it would if I earned the money myself.
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Are The Rich Happy?
Stephen Leacock
Let me admit at the outset that I write this essay without adequate material. I have never known, I have never seen, any rich people. Very often I have thought that I had found them. But it turned out that it was not so. They were not rich at all. They were quite poor. They were hard up. They were pushed for money. They didn’t know where to turn for ten thousand dollars.
(more…)Pay, Pay, Pay!
Frank Crane
Whatever you get you pay for, one way or another.
The cheapest plan is to pay cash.
(more…)Insurance Up To Date
Stephen Leacock
A man called on me the other day with the idea of insuring my life. Now, I detest life-insurance agents; they always argue that I shall some day die, which is not so. I have been insured a great many times, for about a month at a time, but have had no luck with it at all.
(more…)How To Make A Million Dollars
Stephen Leacock
I mix a good deal with the Millionaires. I like them. I like their faces. I like the way they live. I like the things they eat. The more we mix together the better I like the things we mix.
(more…)My Financial Career
Stephen Leacock
When I go into a bank I get rattled. The clerks rattle me; the wickets rattle me; the sight of the money rattles me; everything rattles me.
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